Lil' Baby Engle: October 2013

Trenton is a ONE year old. What a year full of chaos and fun!
It has by far been one of the hardest yet most rewarding years of our life thus far. But, that smile of his sure makes it all worth it.

Compared to his peers, he is still a pretty mellow mannered toddler, but when he is at home in his comfort zone... it is a whole other ball game. He has definitely mastered the whine/tantrum.. in fact, he has begun to sit down and put his face on the ground if he isn't getting what he wants (he has scrapes on his nose to prove it). It is kind of funny, until he does it on the floor of a store.. yuck! I am a clean freak, but I will say that having a kid has mellowed me out A LOT. I have learned that if I want to live longer than 27 I will need to just let things slide.. after all, I do have a boy. A boy that likes to eat dirt, rocks, chalk, baby powder, pumpkins etc. I no longer care if he throws his food on the ground and goes back to eat it later. ..there are bigger worries now especially since he is walking. Now I worry about his safety. He likes to say hello to everyone, whether they are across the street or outside of a store.. he goes straight for the doors. I've learned, toddlers are CONSTANT. I already thought that Moms were super heros after having given birth and going through the newborn stage. Now, I KNOW they are. You have to have X-ray vision and see through walls so these kids don't do/touch/eat/go/throw something they aren't supposed to. Toddlers are CRAZY and definitely a full time job. How can daycares POSSIBLY watch every kid there the way they need to be? I guess for the parents it is out of sight and out of mind so you just hope that nothing goes seriously wrong each day. Yikkees.

I feel so incredibly blessed to be able to be home now with Trenton. It is a total sacrifice and decision but I am so content with my life now and I really feel like I am where I need to be. I am so lucky to have such a supportive, incredible, hardworking husband and father to Trenton. Shaun is such an incredible man and is doing everything in his power to give us the best life possible. I just adore that man. He knows and acknowledges how hard it is to stay home and raise a child and thanks me all the time for it. He is just a gem. Being at home is hard and there are long days... especially when you are trying to be a 'frugalista' (watch your spending). We clean, cook, bake, shop, go to parks, go on walks, go to beaches, garden, play in the yard, meet up with friends/play dates etc. I am never bored but it is hard to find free entertainment or just anything that will keep both of our attention for long. We read, play games, do art projects, sing songs, play chase, wrestle, snuggle and take naps. Trying to get things done like write an email or shower is close to impossible. Going to an office was SO much easier.. peace and quiet, enjoy my coffee, get stuff done. He whines and walks in my shower with his PJ's on and holds my legs so I will pick him up. How do people do this!? I have learned that sometimes they just have to cry and figure it out. Shutting the door and letting him cry until he goes and distracts himself with a toy is the best thing for both of us. Which also reminds me to mention the whole SLEEP topic...

We have now (knock on wood) successfully sleep trained him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is a HUGE breakthrough. As of just a couple of weeks ago he was waking up 3 times a night and would not go back to sleep unless I gave him 'the boob'. He didn't even wake up like this when he was a newborn! We were so frusterated. I was exhausted. I definitely created bad sleep habits when I was working because I just wanted to keep him happy since I was feeling guilty and night time became our bonding time. To bond, I would feed him throughout the night on demand and bring him into our room early each morning (3am) to cuddle until my alarm would go off at 5. I loved that time and it had become a routine so I didn't think anything of it. However, once I quit, I knew that I really needed to start getting sleep to function. I slowly weaned him off 'the boob' during the night which was HELL. He would pinch, bite, pull and punch me to give it to him. He knew that I knew what he wanted and didn't understand why I wasn't giving it to him all of a sudden. It was so hard and so sad. I felt horrible. I knew that I could soothe him and be able to go back to sleep within 5 minutes if I just gave in but I had to stick it out a couple of nights for both of us. He needed to learn to soothe himself and go to sleep without it. It was a LONG couple of nights. Once he was officially night weaned we had to break his habits of waking up each of those times. He knew he wasn't going to get the boob now but he still needed holding, rocking, soothing from us to fall back to sleep. This is also hard.. it took a couple of nights and then eventually letting him whine and cry for intervals. Finally, after a couple of nights he cried for 17 minutes and passed out. I couldn't believe it. Then the next night, he NEVER WOKE UP! Praise the Lord! It was a miracle. I WILL GET SLEEP AGAIN... unbelievable. I couldn't believe it. Shaun was beginning to think I was crazy with my strategy but then it worked. It was a great day. It has been a couple days now and he is doing great. I am so much happier for him and for us. We ALL can finally get some real sleep that we have been lacking for a year now. Life is good.

Other than that, Trenton is a pretty good/normal toddler. Although, I guess sleep troubles is totally normal for toddlers. He is saying a couple of words like dada, momma, dog and his all time favorite word right now... "Wooowww". He points to everything and says "woow", he drops things and says "woow", he falls and says "woow". Apparently I say that word a lot because he picked it right up. He knows what sound a cow makes (Moooooo), he knows what "yellow" is and if you say "Onee" he will say "two". He can take things apart and put them back together, he unscrews things and screws it back, he plays in the tupperware drawer and puts the right lids on, he puts things away in the right baskets, he helps me do laundry.. he is a pretty smart kid and it is so fun to watch him learn and discover everyday. He is just so precious & life is just SO good.

This is the stuff life is made of.. and I finally feel like I am LIVING life. AMEN?!

Hugs,

Momma T